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Patroclus walks up to Achilles nervous about what he should say. He cared for Achilles a great deal and did not want him to put himself in the line of fire. Nervously pacing back and forth in front of the tent, Patroclus was practicing what to say.
"Patroclus," Achilles said with a sigh, "I can see you pacing in front of my tent. Would you like to come in and discuss with me whatever is bothering you so." Patroclus stopped in his tracks, realizing this was a bad idea but he came in the tent with a smile. "Hello Achilles, it's been a while... how are you?" Patroclus said half smiling.
"Patroclus, we ate lunch together an hour ago. What is causing your distress. I don't like your energy right now." Achilles stood up and walked over to his friend touching his shoulder. Patroclus refused to look Achilles in the eye.
"Achilles, please don't go into battle. You don't have to, it will be the death of you. Let me go in your stead, I have been training I can do this!" Patroclus pleaded with Achilles. Achilles looked concerned shaking his head. "Patroclus I wont let you do that, I must lead my people."
The two fought back and forth for a while finally Patroclus won Achilles over and convinced him to stay back and allow for Patroclus to go in his stead. Patroclus would wear Achilles' armor into battle and fight in his stead. Achilles was worried about Patroclus as he was his dearest friend and someone he could not live without.
As Patroclus left for battle, Achilles prayed night and day to Apollo, "please, deliver him home to me safely, for he is the last I can trust and could not see him to his death." Apollo listened, and attempted to stop Patroclus from getting over the wall by knocking him back down. Patroclus was driven with motivation to win for Achilles, but was frightened that this was a sign. He left the wall thinking Achilles would be angry with him for such cowardice.
Suddenly Patroclus was blinded and he knew he would never see Achilles again. Crying out, Patroclus last words were pleading with Apollo to keep his dear Achilles safe from harm. If Patroclus could take away the pain Achilles might have to endure it would all be worth it.
Once the news of Patroclus' death reached Achilles he was devastated, he cried night and day and could not sleep without him there. Achilles was moved to rage and would punch the sun itself if he could. His anger directed toward the Trojans lead to his ultimate death, but not before he had his revenge on his dear Patroclus.
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Authors Note: I kept the plot of the story essentially the same, but allowed for more characterization of Patroclus and Achilles. I read up on the characters and often times people will assume they are lovers, and while it was not quite written like that, Homer did not do a lot to shift suspicion away from that being the case though, so I thought as a treat they could be in love.
Bibliography: Bibliography: The Iliad retold by Alfred J. Church (1907).
In Roman and Greek times, male lovers were actually pretty common, so I like the feeling that you gave, of the two being lovers deeply concerned about each other. You also did an amazing job in giving some character to the two men, as many ancient stories lack a feeling of character depth. The despair that either of them would experience if the other were to die is prominent, hooking your reader, who wants to figure out the ultimate end of the story.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much!
DeleteHi Savannah!
ReplyDeleteI think adding more characterization to the characters of Patroclus and Achilles was a very good choice! I think that characterization for people from ancient stories is easy to get lost in translation, or people assume everyone already knows it so why write it down? I also think that writing them as lovers (which is implied in The Iliad) added a lot to the story.
Cady
Thank you! I agree, it makes the characters more fun :)
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